out-of-phase

I’d like to pause for a moment to bring up a serious subject.

Did you know that it is estimated that over half a million people in the U.S. alone suffer from what is known as Delayed Sleep Phase Syndrome? People who are afflicted with this sleep disorder have their circadian rhythms shifted out-of-phase, and tend to fall asleep well after midnight and have a very difficult time waking up early. This horrible problem leads people to do things like post blogs at 3am, or stay up really late surfing the internet. Although sometimes they stay up late making dope beats. Anyways, then they set their alarm clocks–often 2 or 3 of them–to go off at a decent time, only to have the uncontrollable urge to hit the snooze button over and over again for a span of several hours.

You may be asking yourself, what can I do to help solve this awful problem? There must be something I can do to help these poor people? Well, there is. First off, you can go to your doctor and tell him/her that you are interested in trying out sleep drugs such as Lunesta and Ambien. Then, after you receive a sample pack of drugs, you can mail them off to my address. If enough people can do this, I can then fill a bottle full of these pills. Then I can take masking tape and a sharpie, and label the bottle “magic happy sleep pills.” You see, it’s quite simple and will cost you next to nothing.

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Published in: on May 28, 2008 at 3:33 am  Comments (2)  

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2 CommentsLeave a comment

  1. I’ll get working on those magic happy sleep pills for ya.

    First to leave a comment, but nothing necessarily intriguing to say.

  2. I’ve had this syndrome all my life. It’s called being creative. 😉


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